{ يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوٓاْ إِنَّ مِنۡ أَزۡوَٰجِكُمۡ وَأَوۡلَٰدِكُمۡ عَدُوّٗا لَّكُمۡ فَٱحۡذَرُوهُمۡۚ وَإِن تَعۡفُواْ وَتَصۡفَحُواْ وَتَغۡفِرُواْ فَإِنَّ ٱللَّهَ غَفُورٞ رَّحِيمٌ } [Surah At-Taghābun: 14]

Abdul Haleem: Believers, even among your spouses and your children you have some enemies- beware of them- but if you overlook their offences, forgive them, pardon them, then God is all forgiving, all merciful.

Usually the closest people to us are our family members. Our spouse, our children. We love them the most, rely on them the most and have the most hope in them bringing us happiness.

However when these very people are the source of heart ache and pain, it can be very difficult to bare. This is because we may have placed them at the very top of our list of those we love. Although we should never have loved them the MOST, relied on them the MOST, nor expected them to bring us the MOST happiness. Allah tells us in the same surah that...

{ ٱللَّهُ لَآ إِلَٰهَ إِلَّا هُوَۚ وَعَلَى ٱللَّهِ فَلۡيَتَوَكَّلِ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنُونَ } [Surah At-Taghābun: 13]

Abdul Haleem: God! There is no god but Him, so let the faithful put their trust in Him.

{ إِنَّمَآ أَمۡوَٰلُكُمۡ وَأَوۡلَٰدُكُمۡ فِتۡنَةٞۚ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُۥٓ أَجۡرٌ عَظِيمٞ } [Surah At-Taghābun: 15]

Abdul Haleem: Your wealth and your children are only a test for you. There is great reward with God:

There is no doubt that family is one of the greatest blessings of Allah, but they are also our test in life. Just as every blessing we have is also a test.

So when our spouse or children let us down, we have to remind ourselves to only trust in Allah and know that true contentment can only be found with Him. And if they happen to err we forgive them. Even if they were to go astray, which is the greatest fear of a parent or spouse. Then know that...

{ وَأَطِيعُواْ ٱللَّهَ وَأَطِيعُواْ ٱلرَّسُولَۚ فَإِن تَوَلَّيۡتُمۡ فَإِنَّمَا عَلَىٰ رَسُولِنَا ٱلۡبَلَٰغُ ٱلۡمُبِينُ } [Surah At-Taghābun: 12]

Abdul Haleem: so obey God and the Messenger. If you turn away, remember that Our Messenger’s duty is only to make plain his message.

Your job is to fear Allah as much as you can and save yourself and your family from the Fire. Guidance was never in your hands. Just as it was never in the hands of the greatest Messenger SAW.

Finally return to what will bring you the most contentment. Be mindful of Allah and always make Him your number one source of happiness. Always remind yourself that no one can ever take His place.

{ فَٱتَّقُواْ ٱللَّهَ مَا ٱسۡتَطَعۡتُمۡ وَٱسۡمَعُواْ وَأَطِيعُواْ وَأَنفِقُواْ خَيۡرٗا لِّأَنفُسِكُمۡۗ وَمَن يُوقَ شُحَّ نَفۡسِهِۦ فَأُوْلَٰٓئِكَ هُمُ ٱلۡمُفۡلِحُونَ } [Surah At-Taghābun: 16]

Abdul Haleem: be mindful of God as much as you can; hear and obey; be charitable- it is for your own good. Those who are saved from their own meanness will be the prosperous ones:

The last thought from this ayah is to remember, no matter what your trial. When giving charity remember there is always someone who is in desperate need of all that you have. Be grateful for the blessings of Allah, focus on them. Ward off calamities by giving I charity and remain mindful of Allah and never divert your focus. The happiness you seek is with Him.