This passage of ayaat is talking about the importance of not reminding people about financial charity, because it hurts people's feelings - no one likes to take handouts, and everyone would prefer to be in the position of giving rather than receiving.

British people tend to keep discussions about money relatively hush-hush, so keeping financial transactions/charity to yourself is often more culturally normal than boasting about it everywhere. So I got thinking more broadly about lessons to take from this ayah.

Even if it's not charity, I think there is a tendency to point out a physical action you do for someone, with the intention to get a 'thank you' or similar action in return.

For example: if I wash my brother's car at the same time as I wash mine, the next time I see him I might jokingly say 'You're welcome!'... or if I go out with my friends and decide to pay the bill for everyone, I might casually say something like, 'Next one's on you guys!'

As if my brother asked me to wash his car for him. Or my friends want the responsibility to pay for everyone's meal.

Did I do those things to get those comments/actions in return? I didn't think I did at the time... I claimed I did it to make Allah happy; to help out my brother who is really busy; to show my love for my friends.... So then why did I say those things? Why did I ruin my intentions? Why didn't it occur to me that those fleeting comments could drag down my brother's self-esteem; or could cause anxiety in my friend who's struggling to raise her family as it is, such that she might avoid our next get-together out of fear she'd be expected to pay?

It's part of the culture around me - maybe I was trying to be funny, maybe I wasn't being serious, maybe I was trying to make things less awkward in my own way...but I want to be part of the culture Allah creates in these ayahs instead.

I want to remember that Allah is Al-Ghani - He doesn't need me, so everything I do is for my own benefit - not for Allah's or anyone else's benefit. I want to be forbearing, kind, and understanding towards others as well - just like Al-Haleem.

So I'm going to try and be more conscious of my words and actions to make sure that I don't hurt other people's feelings - intentionally or unintentionally - and so I don't corrupt my own intentions along the way either

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Sorry about typo error...it's Zaynab. My sweet Zaynab

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