Verse 26-27 Say, ‘God, holder of all control, You give control to whoever You will and remove it from whoever You will; You elevate whoever You will and humble whoever You will. All that is good lies in Your hand: You have power over everything. You merge night into day and day into night; You bring the living out of the dead and the dead out of the living; You provide limitlessly for whoever You will.’

In this blessed month of Rabi Al-Awwal, the first spring, Allah SWT has honoured me with life after being on the brink of death. Many nights ago I found myself in the emergency department at the hospital struggling to breathe, with intense pains in my chest. To suddenly be separated from my young children not knowing if it would be the last time I would see them, I was thrown into the unknown, the darkness, into a pit of fear and anxiety. Alhamdulillah my illness was caught in time and my treatment began.

As I was regaining hope that I will get to hold my children again, a profound sadness held onto me so tightly by the sounds of overwhelming pain and suffering coming from an elderly woman next to me in the ward. She was dying from lung cancer. How quickly I had thought that I was 'safe' in comparison to the many I had witnessed around me that night.

I was reminded of these ayaat.

Allah SWT is constantly honouring us and humbling us, He is constantly bringing us into the darkness and back into the light. Through His Supreme Perfection, He is causing life to emerge from us and also death. And all that He causes is nothing but good. Subhan'Allah, I realised that there was absolutely no difference between myself and the woman next to me. In every moment the air that was being inhaled and exhaled by us, no matter how painful, Allah SWT was still honouring us and humbling, He was still blessing us with the light and the darkness, the sorrow and the comfort, the hope and the fear, the life and the death. Constantly, so seamlessly, so that every single moment is a chance of experiencing His Mercy and Authority over all of us, to fill us with love and gratitude towards Him, realising that each breath we take in, is ultimately going to be taken back by Him. That was a wake up call, in the way a newborn cries entering this earthly realm, emerging into the unknown, in fear, yet in complete awe of the Creater and unconditional love towards the Most Merciful. This is the first spring, of many. Alhamdulillahi RabbilAlameen.

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